On Hope and Resilience when nothing seems to be working out
Life is like a pendulum. It oscillates from moments of peace, clarity, and deep joy to moments when you feel lost, confused, misunderstood, and dejected. It’s easy for you to give in and give up hope. And the curveballs keep coming like a domino that falls then the others follow in suit. It’s easy to get sucked in. Your once bright eyes turn dull and empty. Dead puppy eyes. You now see life from the rearview mirror. Thinking you could have done better. And if you had a chance to travel back in time, you would definitely take it as though your life depends on it.
But why do you tend to romanticize the past? Why does it all seem clear now than it was back then? The answer lies in how you interpret what happened. The could’ve and should’ve are meaningless now. They keep you stuck in destructive patterns of doubt, worry, shame, and stagnation.
To get yourself out of that dark hole of despair, you need to be proactive. You must realize that whatever you’re feeling is a form of energy. This kind of energy can destroy you if you keep feeding it with negativity. It becomes a huge monstrous ball of envy, shame, disbelief, doubt, and it will wreck you into smithereens. But you can channel harmful emotional energy to become fuel for your betterment. You’ve heard of people, friends, or relatives who have overcome adversity and made it a springboard to achieve incredible feats such as successful businesses, jobs, and even marriages. It could be you too, why not?
To harness the power of adversity, you need to start with what you consume mentally, physically, and even spiritually. Surround yourself with people who embody your dream qualities. Read empowering literature. Start that new venture you have been procrastinating. Be wary of people online and offline who wallow in their failures and continually embrace victimhood. You want to program your brain with the best experiences. Cut out all the noise. Focus on self-developing and rising from your own ashes. Now you’re channeling destructive energy into productive energy.
A cliché saying that really works for me during difficult times is ‘keep going” or “do the next thing”. I read the last one “do the next thing” from Elisabeth Elliot’s book on Suffering is Never for Nothing. Elisabeth narrates that when her dad died and they had finalized the burial, they went back home. As somber as their mood was and broken as their souls were, their mother quickly picked a broom and started sweeping the kitchen. It was surprising seeing their mom doing so. Such a little gesture speaks volumes of the importance of hope and resilience. Elisabeth’s mum did the next thing despite the turmoil in her heart, she knew that she still has to keep going.
So never lose grasp of hope. Never belittle your strength to withstand tough times when it’s easier to throw in the towel. Guard your mind. Find the purpose and meaning in your suffering and let it usher in a new era of self-improvement.